There is no Limit

There's enough for everyone, I remind myself every once in awhile. Sometimes it's harder to believe. When Casey and I were talking about having a 3rd child, my biggest concern was my ability to give unconditional love and acceptance to another child. The lack of sleep, the physical limitations, the financial costs, etc. are all temporary and seem to get quickly outweighed by the benefits. But I was far more concerned with my ability to give love and acceptance. I've worked very hard for the boys I already have and I don't want them to suffer any lack, nor would I want to parent a new baby with anything less than I gave the first two.

Fortunately, I am learning from the abundance mentality of the boys. The boys (almost 7 and just turned 5) were pretty quickly accepting and their acceptance has grown into excitement. Early on, I even tried to communicate my scarcity concerns for them. Trying to explain that a poopy diaper might interfere with a game, and that we'd have to fit 4 people into the reading chair at night, etc. These things do not concern them. William has shown me where Henri would sit in the chair and Aaron wants to practice changing diapers so he can help. The boys bring up Henri in ordinary conversation, talking about what he might be doing right now or what he'll do when he comes out. A couple weeks ago William was telling a new babysitter about his other brother Henri and showing her things he had made for Henri, till the sitter wondered what was going on. So William had to say, "Well, he's still in mommy's tummy." But more importantly, they seem to have no concerns for what this addition might mean for their emotional needs. Perhaps a quick story from Sunday morning best explains it.

Taking a break from a morning of pajamas, cartoons and playing, the boys were eating a donut on the deck. Aaron said, "This wouldn't be near as much fun without William." After checking what he might mean, he talked about how much William added to everyday life. William, who had been sitting there listening, piped up, "Yeah, and when Henri gets here it will be even better."

As the other Henri said, "With an abundancy mentality we say: 'There is enough for everyone, more than enough: food, knowledge, love ... everything.' With this mind-set we give away whatever we have, to whomever we meet. When we see hungry people we give them food; when we encounter people in need of love, we offer them friendship and affection and hospitality and introduce them to our family and friends."

So Henri VanDyke, your family is still human and will be selfish sometimes, but we're excited, and hang on because I've got a feeling it's going to be quite a ride.